Saturday, December 31, 2011

WHY

it's another new year and things have been the same for me.
at times, that feelings of loneliness and depression creep over me, smothering me, until i feel like i am a single white dot on a black sea.
people move on, but i am still stagnant and alone.
they say the higher power is fair but all i felt was injustice being done on my part on on the parts of people that have been mean and dubious and will continue to do so given the right chance and opportunity.
they say, don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you.
i never break someone's heart. not that i know of. and not with an intention of doing so.
i gave my all in relationships but that was just not enough for people who have no value of my love and not worthy of my sacrifice.
before this, i would probably cry and lament on my shitty life and ask the most prominent question, why?
but now, i don't even have the strength to even pour out a single tear out of my eye for such a useless question.
they say if you listen really hard, you can actually hear the power above speaking.
but all i am listening is my own whining voice.
being ungrateful of what i have and longing for what i don't possess.
i started to think that karma and all that bullshit didn't really work.
bad people, screw ups like those scumbags get nothing in return for hurting me and being mean.
whereas, people with no ill intentions whatsoever get hit again and again, for what?
for doing nothing? for hurting nobody?
when is the world going to become a fair place?
a safe haven where people who are good are rewarded accordingly and people who are bad are punished for their bad deeds?
some people just weren't meant to be born.
with their birth into this world, they just keep hurting others and messing up other people's life.
these people should be exiled. you should not add them as friends on facebook.
still, there are still an ignorant few who seem oblivious to the true colour of a person.
still wrapped around in their little bubble of freakin' happiness.
bringing another person into this already cruel and lopsided world?
that is the true meaning of happiness?
if it is, that maybe i was meant to be alone and lonely after all.
and that is a destiny that is hard to swallow but impossible to spit either.
and that is the path that i have to tread.
and that is the future that i have to look forward to.

because the force above knows that i can handle it.
i am strong enough to filter all these negativity.
i am resilient enough to tolerant fake bitches and masquerading impostors.
i am the light that shine in the darkness.
i am the energy that keeps hope alive.
i am me, and that makes all the difference between a frail little human shit like you and me.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

PURR.....


I've got 3 perfumes now :)


Yup...Katy Perry's Purr this time...


Cat!! All my perfume bottles are purple...

Thursday, December 1, 2011

ALEXANDRE CHRISTIE..now I look like a Mak Datin :P



And it's shimmering, ring, ring......



Can I be a hand model??? hahaha...


Obligatory pose when showing off new watch :P

Thursday, November 24, 2011

if only ppl know how much it hurts to pretend not to care.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

...

Technology, like SMS is not all bad. The reason is because SMS can be used to help people who are living with speech and hearing impairment to communicate with other people. I witnessed this when one of my relatives paid a visit to my house last night. He brought along his lovely wife, who are also in the same boat as him. Although the atmosphere was quiet and there was no laughter and chatters, still we (my mom, dad, them and me) were able to communicate using his phone and my phone by typing SMS as a medium of communication. A lot of people always blame SMS as they think that the short forms and the mixture of Malay Language and English used in SMS is the source of ‘Bahasa Rojak’; so much so that students tend to use the same language they type in SMS in their essays at school and in exams. Well, that is just one downside of SMS. And the technology is not to be blamed. Blame the people using the technology in excess njslegi rgiuergheriupgh gtriu

P/S: I have no idea what to write. Just the thought that “them” in the ramblings above looked so sweet together that I have to write a post about it. Or maybe that is just the hormone kicking in.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

THEY THINK , BUT NOT ENOUG

They think they can boss you around to do things you don’t want to do.

They think they can shift the job they don’t want to do to you, just because they don’t feel like doing it, just because they pretend they don’t know how to do it, just because they have ‘commitments’, ‘commitments’ they deemed more important that your commitments.

They think they can put the blame on you. Since they already shift the job to you, if some cock-ups happen, well it’s not their responsibilities anymore. The guilt is on you.

They think you are easy to make fun of, just because you are silent and accept things coming your way, may it be pleasant or unpleasant things.

They think you don’t have a mind on your own, since you never speak up to the injustice done to you.

They think they can hop around in glee for being released from the burden on their shoulder, by putting the burden on your shoulder, because you, unlike other people have all the time in the world to deal with shenanigans by miscreants who are cane-proof.

They think they have won, when you just shrug it off and pretend not to be hurt by their stupid and silly comments on private parts of their body. When you never ever even think to look at them for more than what is necessary, let alone, to stare at them long enough to find things to comment about their body.

They think they can peek at your personal details and give their two cents worth of how you should manage your life.

They think, but not enough, to meddle in other people’s private and personal business, private and confidential matters as well as little secrets that wasn’t meant for the public.

They think, but not enough.

PRAYERS FOR THE LITTLE GIRL.

i would have posted the picture or video, but i just don't have the heart to do it.

FUCK these ignorant bastards.

Hope Yue Yue lives when HUMANITY dies.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

DIPAKSA & SUKARELA

Negara Malaysia ni tak menggalakkan org sambung belajar ke peringkat tertinggi ke?

Kenapa penjawat awam yg nk sambung master tak diberi biasiswa?

Penjawat awam yang dipaksa sambung belajar ke peringkat degree sebab takut rugi masa pencen diberi biasiswa pulak?

Bukankah kita digalakkan menuntut ilmu sepanjang hayat?

DUNIA MEMANG TAK ADIL.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

WTF??!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

i still hope we get back together.

especially when i'm alone at night with nothing to think of but you.

sure, i'm getting ordinary everyday.

but that't because everybody expect normality in their lives.

nobody expect less.

not even you.

but, believe it or not,

she will turn ordinary too.

Someday.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Armando, Armando...when are you going to come..

Sunday, September 25, 2011

kenapa orang yang selalu curang dan tak setia diberikan peluang berkali2 untuk menikmati alam perkahwinan atau pun percintaan dgn orang yang setia dan ikhlas dalam bercinta?

kenapa orang yang selalu berharap untuk menemui cinta sejati tak pulak diberikan peluang untuk bahagia dalam alam percintaan mahupun alam perkahwinan?

kata2 klise "Awak akan jumpa orang yang lebih baik dari saya" memang dah basi. Dua bekas aku sebelum ni mengeluarkan ayat yang sama dalam usaha untuk menutup kesalahan masing2 dan mungkin ayat tu akan dapat bantu mereka tidur di malam hari (tanpa mengenang kembali kecurangan dan pelbagai tipu muslihat yang dilakukan dulu, dan mungkin masih dilakukan lagi).

kenapa lelaki2 yang menipu isteri mereka semata2 nak menagih madu kekasih yang jauh lebih muda dari mereka tak dilaknat dan dimatikan sahaja nafsu mereka?

bagaimana pula dengan isteri2 muda yang mendapat suami kaya tetapi mengadu mereka kesunyian dan dambakan belaian lelaki2 gagah perkasa?

kalau aku yang diberikan pasangan yang setia, bonus kalau mereka itu kaya raya macam datuk2 yang isterinya melanggan gigolo kerana kesunyian, mungkin aku takkan meminta2 lagi untuk diberikan lebih.

tetapi itulah lumrah manusia. tak pernah puas dengan apa yang ada.

mungkin Tuhan tak memberikan aku kehidupan yang semua wanita inginkan kerana Dia tahu aku mungkin diperlukan untuk tujuan lain yang lebih besar.

cuma aku sahaja yang selalu mengeluh dan 'buta' dengan petunjuk2 yang diberikanNya.

apa yang kita mahu tak semestinya kita miliki, dan apa yang kita miliki tak semestinya yang kita mahu.

Wallahuallam.

P/S:Aku nampak bekas rakan sekelas aku masa di Tingkatan 1 SEMENZA dekat pejabat pos Tesco tadi. Dia beli setem sambil pegang dekat 20 kad bersampul warna putih. Ditemani seorang lelaki.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

just make up ur fucking mind..1833 or 2133?
6013 or 6014??
GOD!!!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

OUT OF ADD/DROP DURATION!

I FUCKING HATE TECHNICALITIES. PERIOD.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

INGLISH

They should have used all those dictionaries they are selling before putting up this stupid-ass sign...

Thursday, September 15, 2011

FETISH FOR LEATHER

Yeah, bite me...but i'm a sucker for wedges...the taller, the better.....p/s:i like my man the same way...

wedges+studded+leather=fetish!


Everbest...

Friday, September 2, 2011

i'm lonely. that's a fact u can suck on.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

kok ye pun nk menyamar jd ak, tukar la sex tu dulu.
ak bukannya male,duhhh

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

I wish i could tell u that i'm happy.
but i'm not.
because you broke ur promise.
of being there forever.
i guess it is true.
ur talk is really empty.

Monday, May 30, 2011

dumbshits...

Slope FAIL!



Parking FAIL!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

PINK CATALOGUE

Hye, take a look at the catalogue.

This one is new, and that one too.

What about the pink one?

You can get a discount for items on page 45 if you buy that.

Maybe get three of those together.

You can even get a free umbrella with that.

Don’t you just love the mid-year mega sale?

FEDORA

Guys in fedora hats. My favourite.
So yummy and delicious.
Got me thinking.
Why the hat?
Receding hairline?
Chronic dandruff?
No money to buy hair styling gel?
Either reason, I heart them.
Maybe I could get one for myself.
The hat, and the guy.

18 SX

She stared at the empty windows...

Watching a couple of birds taking a short break on her window sill. Her own personal life is in ruin. The birds have better chances than her to be healthy emotionally and physically as a result of healthy relationship and physical contact. She showed her teeth to those birds ala Edward Cullen when he turns to a vampire. The birds flew away, after watching this giant human bird with big fangs for teeth. She sighed, she is even picking fights with animals now. What’s to become of her?

She should be easy riding by now. She got a job. She got a whale like shopping desire. She got a car. She even got a place to stay although it is just a place to sleep and bathe. To the naked eye, she has it all. But only she knows, her heart is dry and her soul is wandering, not belonging to her anymore.

She sighed loudly now. Wanting to know where life will take her and why she had to endure this feeling of not knowing where to go and what to do. Oh, that’s an oxymoron, “not knowing what to do” when she got tonnes of work to do. But she has no desire to touch all those work. She has no desire for everything else. She has o desire to entertain herself.

For a couple of minutes, she hovers around. Back and forth in her claustrophobic room. Whether that room is claustrophobic or she is or both are claustrophobic, no-one could tell. She feels empty. Everyone is isolated from her. Even the air she breathes feels foreign to her. An alien would be more at home than she is right now.

She hates uncertainty. Having to wait on other people’s terms is just so daunting a task for her. Why we gotta to hurt each other and make each other’s life harder to boost our self ego? And of course everybody think their time is precious, everybody should play by their rules. My business is more important that yours. So, I have to be given special privileges. Yak, yak, yak on and on they go amplifying their so called predicaments.

She is sick and tired listening to those complains and gossips. Everybody just knows how to speak but nobody really acts. We hide behind the pretence that we care while in reality she doesn’t really care. Who gives a shit about how you really feel? Nobody cares. And its time everybody realizes that.

She gets really sick at time. Wondering why she, had to be denied the rights every woman should have? Maybe it is because her flabby arms or unsightly thighs...or maybe it is because her oily, pimply skin...or maybe it is because her boring personality and lack of passion for everything.

Is her life destined for companionship with dildo and vibrators and nipple clamps? She wonders...

Saturday, May 7, 2011

YOU GOT BOYFRIEND, I GOT TRACCE...

I've worn higher, but this is Mega High...

Nothing spells 'powerful' and 'confidence' than a bit of added height :P

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

i'm single.
i can't tell you how irritating it is to see you and your PDAs.

but i guess, u can turn back at me and say, "What is it to you?"
"Don't hate us because you ain't us!"

yeah, i wish i'm not
because i would puke green slime if i turn out to be like you.

P/S: you know i lied, because inside you are snickering like Ghost Face in Scream 1, 2, 3, and 4.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

i am always left out

but that does not make me die

good to know i do not matter

so you can have the silver platter all by yourself

you are beautiful

you are sexy

you are always right

but bear one thing in mind

you come into this world like me

and you check out the same way

so what is so great about you?

Saturday, April 9, 2011

SPF 50 for Boo...

Shiny, shiny car...


The number is blurred for anti-stalker protection...


The honorary driver and navigator...

Yours truly...

Thursday, March 17, 2011

FOR YOU GUYS & GALS...

If you were a new teacher who just got finished your studies , clueless about what you should do, here are some tips that you would want to follow:

  • They say without Kursus Induksi or BTN, you can’t get an interview. But that is not true. After you got your posting letter, make sure you go to the posting briefing. If you receive no letter, just phone your JPN to take note of the place and date for the briefing. Usually, this briefing, together with your posting, will be done, approximately between 2 weeks to a month after you finished studying. Make sure you received your Surat Tawaran GST. There are 4 pages all together. Make sure you make a copy of these 4 pages as these documents are necessary when you want to apply for your interview.

  • Now that you are posted to the school, make sure you give every documents needed to your school’s clerk. I remembered giving copies of my IC, Birth Cert, SPM Cert, my posting letter (make sure you asked for your Principal’s Signature to authenticate the date of your posting to the school), Surat Tawaran GST, and all the forms that come with your posting envelope (during the briefing, they will give you an envelope with the Surat Tawaran GST, and some forms that need to be returned to SPP).

  • As a government servant, you need to open up a KWSP account. They will give you a piece of paper with your account number. Keep a copy of this form and give one copy to your school’s clerk in order to complete your documents checklist.

  • After you settled everything with the clerk, now you need to apply for SPP interview for permanent position. Just go to www.spp.gov.my and register online. Take your time and make sure you fill in the correct info required. You need to get your scroll first, meaning you have to graduate and go to convocation first, because in the online form, it will ask for your date of graduation which is stated in the scroll that you have received. As for me, I got posted in July, graduated in October and got my SPP interview in March. The date varies from state to state. Some of my friends already got the interview in January. So, you need to check the website regularly and prepare beforehand for the interview.

  • Right, now you have applied and the last time you checked online, you got the interview! About a week before the interview, they will send you a letter, informing your Principal about your interview. If the interview falls on a working day, make sure you make a Surat Kebenaran KJ untuk Menghadiri Temuduga. Get your principal to sign it. It will give you more credential for the interview. There are 2 forms that you need to download for the interview, which you can download at the SPP website. One is a form detailing your tasks at school, another is a Laporan Sulit about your performance in school. Your Principal must fill it up and put in an envelope, seal it and give it back to you. Take note of the word “Sulit”, only your principal can see it and the interviewer.
  • Aside from those 2 forms, for the interview you need to bring original documents and copies of these documents, certified, of course. You will need to bring your IC, Birth Cert, SPM Cert, Scroll, Transcript, Surat Tawaran GST, qualification approval from JPA, which you can print from here http://www.interactive.jpa.gov.my/frmMainIktiraf.asp, and lastly, a copy of Kew. 8 (ask from your school’s clerk).

  • Please bring ALL original documents and copies that are certified. And make sure the Laporan Sulit is SEALED. Put all documents in a file according to the list in your call letter. And oh, don’t forget to bring your call letter!

  • Confirm the date, time and venue for your interview. If your interview falls on a Thursday, wear batik. You don’t need to wear a blazer if you wear batik. However, if the interview falls on any other day, wear suitable clothes with a blazer. Don’t forget your name tag. For ladies, court shoes in black, please. And for guys, please put gel on your hair so there won’t be any stray hair on your forehead or whatnot.

  • The key is confidence and the way you carry yourself. Avoid wearing too much make-up and striking colours as these will put off the interviewer. Just be yourself but at the same time, act whenever appropriate. Tackle and handle questions tactfully. It’s like MUET, speak your mind and be prepared with current issues and pedagogy knowledge as well as your experience in school. Avoid answering with negative response like, “Saya tak tahu, tuan.” Or “Saya kurang pasti, tuan”. If you got the group interview, avoid repeating what the other candidates have said, come up with your own idea, preferably something concrete and new to the discussion. As for me, I worked with the candidate seating next to me, I agree with what she said but at the same time, I added up my reply with my own ideas. And yes, the interview is in Bahasa Melayu and also English. So for TESLians, you have to be bilingually good.

  • Before entering the room, knock first and greet your interviewer. Sit comfortably and keep a good eye-contact with the interviewer. He/she will ask you to introduce yourself. Speak loudly and clearly. Tell him/her about yourself, your education, and your roles in school. It is a little bit like public relations. You are trying to sell an image of yourself, but be humble and don’t come across as a snob. He/she will probably ask you about a current issue, so make the TV, newspaper, and the internet your close buddy. Also, familiarize yourself with National Education Philosophy and other current policies in education. It would also be safe to remember the names of important public figures in education. Make sure you know who is the Head of your JPN, PPD, what more, the Head of your school. The name of Ministers should be at your fingertips. Try to recall all those learning theories you have studied as he/she would probably ask you about your approach in the classroom and all those Watson and Bandurra will come in handy.

So, fellas, those are 10 tips to survive yourself in teaching profession. I like to rephrase what the interviewer said to me, the interview is just one tiny bump in your profession, what is more important is the P&P in the classroom. As teachers, we need to be creative and avoid being too idle in a comfort zone. Innovate yourself in order to attract your students to the lesson. Guess I have a long way to go!