Monday, August 17, 2009


Dah berapa kali aku cakap, blog ni tempat aku melepaskan segala-galanya. Yang kau orang sibuk2 nak mencaci maki aku kat sini apehal. Aku ada caci maki kau orang kt blog korang ke? Dah berkali aku cakap aku blogging bukan nak hentam orang, tp orang still tak faham dan asyik2 nak hentam aku. Sukati aku la nak tulis ape pun dlm blog aku. Yg korang2 kecoh ni kenape? Menyusahkan hidup korang ke? Kalau susah, tak payahlah nak buka blog aku. Tak payah baca. Pastu sosek2. Bosan lah tau tak? Benci.

Friday, August 14, 2009


Should we just move on and not giving a fuck about how it all begins?

Should we forget and not giving a fuck about how much it hurts?

Should we be stoic and solid and not giving a fuck about how our hearts are wretched from it all?

Should we be quiet and not speak at all about how it makes us want to bleed and die?

Should we pretend nothing happens when injustice is sneering to us?

Should we stay oblivious when cruelty is taunting us for our lack of emotions?

Should we? Could we? Would we?

Yes. We should. We could. And we would.


If you want to bitch about me in your blog, please don’t make it so obvious. Please, use pseudonyms or whatever to not let me detect that you are bitching about me. I am seriously getting sick and tired of people bitching about me and sicker and more tired that I, somehow or rather know about it. Don’t ask me how I know, but I just knew it. So, next time, if you ever want to bitch about me, why don’t you just tell me or keep it to yourself, if you are just not that good enough to post about it in your blog and keep it a secret. Because somehow or rather, don’t ask me how, I knew.

I never, and trust me when I said never, blog about you in my blog. So, why oh why, you have to blog about me in your blog? God!!!!!

Thursday, August 13, 2009


to all people who long to see me down, congratulations!

to all people who long to see me rise, congratulations!

do all you can to vanquish me.

i'm still here.

you did it to me once, now you did it again.

sekali berhati busuk, selamanya berhati busuk.

berulat, berkulat, manusia macam kau memang tak patut dibiarkan hidup.

virus, parasit, pelesit.

berselindung di sebalik kepura-puraaan dan baik bertujuan.

dulu aku beri peluang dan kemaafan di saat kau seorang dipulau.

tapi sekarang kau buang aku di saat kau tak perlu lagi.


moga kau diadili suatu hari nanti.

manusia berhati busuk.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009


I just finished watching two movies, Obsessed and The Last House on the Left. To other people, it might ne two completely different movies, but for me both movies share the same theme; protecting the one you love no matter to what extent. If somebody hurts the one you love, you should and ought to fight back, not to sit back and let rational thinking does the job. There’s nothing rational about letting somebody keeps hurting the one you love. There’s nothing rational about letting the one you love broken down because of somebody. There’s nothing rational about letting somebody gets away for hurting the one you love.

In the first movie, Obsessed, it’s about a psycho girl, Lisa (Ali Larter) who works as a temporary worker at this office. She is of course, “obsessed” with her boss, Derek (Idris Elba). The thing is, Derek is happily married to Sharon (Beyonce Knowles) and already has a son called Kyle. This is a story about a delusional girl who tries to push Sharon away from the picture of happy family and hope that she could become Sharon. Although, at first, the audience thought that Lisa has gone away for good but she keeps interfering in Derek’s and Sharon’s life. So, what does Sharon do? She goes face to face with the Bitch, Lisa and towards the end of the movie, we get to witness a catfight between Sharon and Lisa. Yes, Sharon is emotional, she should have called the police you said. But let me tell you something, there’s two people that you cannot touch when it comes to a woman’s life; first, her husband and secondly, her child. So, when Lisa crosses the line and touches both of these people, Sharon acts out. Does she act out on emotions? Should she call the police instead when Lisa come into the house unannounced? To hell with that. I support what Sharon did 100%. She fights back. Why? Because she is protecting those two people that she loves more than herself. She fights back out of love. Nobody can get away after hurting the two people that she loves the most. Is that emotional? Is that not rational thinking? Who cares? When somebody hurt the ones you love, are you going to stand back and let justice takes its course? What if justice never comes? That’s what I said with when it comes to love, nothing is rational. You fight back because that’s the right thing to do.

The second movie was about this family who went up a lake for their summer vacation. They are John (the dad), Emma (the mom) and Mary (the daughter). So the daughter thought that she could go to town and met her friend, Paige who works as a cashier at this shop. While they were wasting time away at the shop, there’s this boy, Justin who comes into the store and said that he got some good stuff for both of the girls. They follow Justin to his hotel room and they smoke pot. Before they knew it, Justin’s psycho family came back so these two girls were caught up at the wrong place and at the wrong time. It turns out that Justin’s family is wanted by the police for a killing spree. So, these two girls need to be “shut up” by Justin’s family. Paige was stabbed, Mary was raped but she managed to get away but she was shot in the process. Justin’s family thought that that’s the end of her. Since they were in the woods, they need to find somebody to get a shelter for the night. Guess whose house they found in the remote woods? Mary’s family house at the lake. Justin’s family was oblivious to who John and Emma were but it is Justin who found out that Mary is their daughter but he kept quiet about it. To keep a long story short, Mary managed to crawl back to the house and when John and Emma found out that Justin’s family hurt their little daughter, they sought revenge. Instead of the typical the good family gets slaughtered by the psycho, in this movie the good family becomes the psycho. They had to kill Justin’s family in order to get out safely from the house and send Mary to the hospital. You can say it is a matter of survival of the fittest. But when your family is threatened and the ones that you love is in danger, do you just stand back and let rational thinking do the justice? Or do you let your emotions and your adrenaline rush give those motherfuckers that hurt the one you love a taste of their own medicine?

Sure, it is easy to say, calm down, don’t act out on emotions, think first before you act. Let rational thinking sink in and you will find a way. Yeah, it’s easier said than done. Can you just stand back when the one you love is hurting and every single day he/she is dying because of somebody? Maybe you can, out of rational thinking and to avoid confrontation. But I can’t. So call me emotional. Because I am. But I can’t bear seeing someone I love being in great pain because of somebody. I will fight back for those that I love. I will not stand back and let somebody ridicules my love one. Maybe you look at me and decide that I’m a cold-hearted bitch, well maybe I am. But I will never let my loved ones hurt in vain. Let me take the pain, but not those that I love. That the worth of love for me.

Monday, August 10, 2009


Seekor kucing di tepi jalan, mati dilanggar lori bila hendak melintas jalan sebab mahu memberi makan pada anak-anak kucing yang kelaparan di seberang jalan.

Seorang anak manusia, meminta pertolongan dalam surat khabar untuk menurunkan berat badan akibat makan nasi empat pinggan bersama ayam goreng sebelah ekor setiap hari.

Damn! What the world is coming to?


Biar muka kau hitam dan banyak jerawat, asal hati kau putih dan suci murni.

Biar baju kau compang-comping, asalkan kau tidak mengoyakkan baju orang lain.

Biar kau gelandangan, asalkan kau tidak merampas hak orang lain.

Biar kau seorang, asalkan kau tidak menyusahkan orang lain.

Biar kau dianiayai, asalkan kau tidak menyakiti orang lain.



Di saat aku menyalahkan dunia mengatakan semua orang tidak adil, si dia ada bersamaku.

Di saat air mata aku mengalir untuk kali yang ke berapa ratus ribu, dia ada menemaniku.

Di saat aku berasa aku lah bitch yang paling useless sekali, dia setia menidakkan ke’bitch’an itu.

Di saat aku mahu mati menyerah kalah, dia ada mendengar dan memberi kata semangat.

Di saat aku rasa seorang dan mahu menyorok di ruang paling hujung di dunia, dia ada menyokongku.

Yang penting, dia ada bersamaku.

Seteruk mana pun aku, dia ada bersamaku.

Dia sentiasa ada, bersamaku.

Ada. Bersamaku.

Sunday, August 9, 2009


Salah satu perkara yang membimbangkan ialah lebih banyak post Kebencian daripada post yang lain.


To whom this life may belong to, please note the shortage of oxygen is only temporary. Side effects may include temporary blindness, insanity, anti-socialism, dejection, heavy breathing and radiation of chemical and toxin glares. Supply will be back as usual as materialism and pretentiousness be restored again. We hope this decrement in basic necessity would not deter you from working with us in the near future. Thank you.
How many times are you allowed to give up in your life?


Ada seorang budak yang sangat pemalu di sebuah kampong yang sangat peramah. Setiap hari, budak yang pemalu itu terpaksa menyampaikan salam kepada setiap orang yang lalu dihadapan rumahnya. Walaupun dia amat pemalu dan rasa nak mati setiap kali dia terpaksa bercakap dengan orang yang lalu di hadapan rumahnya, tetapi dia terpaksa berbuat demikian kerana dia adalah anak yang soleh dan tidak pernah mengingkari arahan ibu dan bapanya (bapanya adalah ketua kampong yang sangat digeruni oleh sekalian anak-anak kampong yang tak berguna).

Disebabkan rasa kemaluan yang amat sangat, budak pemalu ini akan berpeluh satu badan setiap kali dia terpaksa tertonggok di depan rumahnya dan memberi salam kepada setiap orang yang lalu di rumahnya. Selepas habis satu hari member salam dan berpura-pura senyum pada orang yang lalu-lalang, baju melayu yang dipakainya akan basah lenjun dek kerana kegentaran dan ketidakkuatan iman budak tersebut menghadapi rasa malunya itu.

Suatu hari, dia terbaca di dalam akhbar yang diaut bungkus nasi lemak bahawa terdapat satu syarikat penerbangan yang berjanji akan menerbangkan budak pemalu ini ke luar Negara dengan tambang yang bisa memberikan kejutan pada kapilari darah yang tersumbat dek kolestrol. Maka, budak ini pun memasang cita-cita untuk melarikan diri dari kampong yang peramah ini apabila dia sudah cukup duit kelak.

Maka, budak ini pun mengumpul duit dengan rajinnya bersama segulung harapan satu hari nanti dia dapat menjejakkan kaki ke negara orang dan meninggalkan kampong peramah yang sangat plastik itu. Selepas 10 tahun, 11 bulan, 12 hari menabung, akhirnya dia berjaya membeli tiket kapal terbang yang diidamkan. Dia dengan bangganya pergi ke lapangan terbang dan menghulurkan tiketnya pada petugas di situ. Tetapi, harapannya hancur apabila pegawai tersebut memberitahu, “Dik, ari ni 9 aribulan 8. Aik beli tiket ni untuk 9 aribulan 7. Dh lepas tarikh ni dik.” Budak yang pemalu itu terus membisu hingga ke hari ini walaupun dia dipanggil anak derhaka oleh bapanya apabila budak itu enggan memberi salam seperti selalu kepada setiap orang yang lalu-lalang di hadapan rumahnya.

Friday, August 7, 2009


Perkara yang paling best dalam hidup aku yang satu adalah bila mama tepon (1 hari kekadang 2-3 kali) and die ckp “I Love You” kt aku. Itu membuatkan hati aku berbunga-bunga.


The definition of happiness varies for person to person. Depends on what you look forward for every morning you wake up in the morning. Some people find joy in making other people happy. Obedient housewives slaving themselves to make breakfast in the morning, cleaning the house all afternoon, washing, ironing clothes, and later preparing dinner for the husband and brats that we called children. And not even a single thank you from husband that still cat-calling other women even after years of marriage and ungrateful children that treat their mom like carpet under their feet. Are these housewives happy? Maybe, even though we can really tell what they really desire inside their deepest of hearts.

Others are more selfish than these selfless housewives, putting their happiness above others. They claim to be individualistic, having their own freedom and making decisions that they think won’t affect others. They are the new breed of people in the new generation that seems to have virtue and concrete objectives in their life. It is good to see these new generation emerging, but at the same time worrying when the only purpose of living for oneself, instead of considering others that may directly or indirectly influence our life.

So, back to the initial question. What is happiness? You tell me.


Kadang kala bila kau dh think the world of one person, everything that the person does is good in your eyes. Tak kira la walaupun orang tu teruk di mata org lain. Tak kira la walaupun org tu teruk dgn kau. Sebab org tu raja di hati kau, walaupun hamba di hati org lain. Bila ada org yang bertakhta di hati kau, semua yang org cakap kau butakan dan kau tulikan. Sebab apa? Sebab org tu perfect di mata kau. Bahaya bila jadi mcm ni. Tapi at least bila jadi mcm ni, you know what it feels like to be madly and passionately in feelings that you cannot even describe.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009



1.You stop believing in everything, including yourself.

2.You shift your attention to once concrete task; only playing the same game in your handphone, keep writing something in your exam pad, cutting your fingernails until it bleeds.

3.You hardly smile, let alone laugh because everything you see loses its colours.

4.You have trouble waking up in the morning because you don’t want to wake up at all.

5.You constantly dread the day, and cry all night.


Life is like an empty parking space, with a stupid car blocking it.


There was once a boy who is a complete nerd. He’s so nerd that all his friends think that the spectacles he’s wearing is nerdy. Even his handwriting shows the making of a nerd. The impact of him being a nerd even impaired his social skills. So much so that people call him anti-social, which is one step above being a nerd.

So, while he was thinking on ways to make him super cool (p/s: he can’t play guitars and make girls swoon over him because his hands are custom made only for nerdy tasks), he came across an advertisement about a postpaid plan on tv. Subscribe to the plan and get a free iPhone. It’s not the plan which was interested but the prospect of getting an iPhone, which was the latest gadget that almost made him come in his pants (he never kissed a girl, let alone shagged one, so his only sexual relief usually came in the form of visual aids, like the sight of iPhone).

Him, being a rich, spoilt kid, asked his father for the money to register for the postpaid plan and to achieve his ambition of owning an iPhone. With a high spirit, he marched to the nearest postpaid centre, and of course, registered. And he got what he hoped for, iPhone.

After 3 months of subscribing to the plan, he had to pay insurmountable amount for the monthly bills but he didn’t care as his father took care of the bills. He managed to get a girlfriend by flashing his iPhone one day in public. Now, he did not even contemplate of getting a life-sized doll. He also became more nerdy with the passing of time but nobody complained because now he thought that he is more sociable because he has the miraculous and magnificent iPhone. And of course, with the iPhone, along comes the girlfriend. So, every time he meets someone nerdy, he would advise them to subscribe to the postpaid plan and get the iPhone, because it is the ultimate recipe for success in social life.